Memory box for a loved one: what to keep and how to store it
Keep a few things that were theirs and in daily use: glasses, a jumper, letters, a recording of their voice. Store fabric and paper apart, in acid-free materials, away from damp.
If you are clearing a home, keep uncertain items together and label the box for a later decision. You can also make a memory box gradually, without a clearance or a fixed deadline.
A memory box holds the objects themselves. When several relatives want the same few things, photographs and copies let more than one person keep them.
Make the memory book together
Invite people to send photos and their own words, then choose what goes in the book.
| Item | How to keep it | Where it goes |
|---|---|---|
| Glasses | Clean them and keep them in their case so the lenses do not scratch against other things. | In the box, in the case |
| Watch or jewellery | Wrap pieces separately to prevent rubbing. Keep any condition or care information with each item. | In the box, in pouches |
| Jumper, shirt or scarf | Check for insects, then fold with rolled acid-free tissue padding each fold. Keep it away from paper. | Its own compartment or a second box |
| Letters and cards | Keep letters flat in folders. Remove loose clips or bands only if this will not tear the paper; leave resistant attachments in place. | In the box, in folders |
| Voice or video recording | Copy the file to two places, name it clearly and check that it plays. | Off the phone, with a card in the box saying where |
| Photographs | Keep in paper or polyester sleeves. Scan any with writing on the back. | In the box, or an album if there are many |
| Mug or small object | Wrap in tissue and pad around it so it cannot move. | At the bottom of the box, away from paper |
| Handwritten recipe or list | Scan it and use the copy. Store the original flat. | Original in the box, copy in use |
| Certificates or medals | Certificates flat in a folder; medals in their case or a cloth pouch. | In the box |
| Battery-powered object | Remove a battery only if safely accessible; keep leaking or damaged parts apart | A separate container, with a photograph in the box |
What goes in
Choose the objects you want to keep: glasses, a watch, a mug, a work item or handwriting. There is no required set, and you do not have to keep one of every kind.
Lay everything out on a table before choosing a box. Size the box to the largest item, with room to lift things out without pulling others with them.
- Their handwriting: a card, a recipe, a note on a calendar.
- Something they wore often.
- An object from work or a hobby.
- A photograph of them with each person who will share the box.
Their voice and video
A voicemail, video clip or voice note on a phone is the item most easily lost. Copy it to a computer as a file and keep a second copy somewhere else.
Name each file with their name, what it is and the date it was recorded. Play the copy back before anything is deleted from the phone.
A box cannot play sound, so put a card inside saying where the recordings are kept.
Storing fabric and paper
The National Archives advises keeping family papers below 75 degrees Fahrenheit, about 24C, and below 65 per cent relative humidity, in acid-free, lignin-free boxes on a shelf.
It warns against damp basements, garages and hot attics, PVC plastic sleeves, and staples or paper clips that are not stainless steel.
The Western Australian Museum recommends checking textiles for insects and padding folds with rolled acid-free tissue. Choose cleaning advice for the actual fabric and its condition.
If you choose to keep a garment unwashed, house it separately from papers. Inspect it periodically; a damaged or delicate garment may need specialist advice before handling.
When several people want the same things
Agree a time when relatives look through everything together, before anything is given away, and write down who asked for what.
Photograph each item on a plain background before it leaves the house, so everyone has a record of the whole set. Letters can be scanned so each person has a full copy.
A shared digital book in tbf scrapbook lets relatives add their own photos and words, with one person choosing what goes in.
Pages to make
Gather and set aside
Collect possible items in one place over a few weeks. Anything uncertain goes into the undecided box rather than being given away.
Look together
Show relatives the whole set before choosing. Note who wants what and photograph the items that will go to other homes.
Prepare each item
Copy recordings, scan letters and photographs, and check fabric for insects. Lift away loose clips only if they release without tearing; leave stuck attachments for a conservator.
Pack and label
Fabric in its own compartment, paper flat in folders, heavy things at the bottom. Tape a contents list inside the lid, saying where the recordings are.
Questions
What size should a memory box be?
Big enough for the largest thing you keep, with space to lift items out. Lay everything out first, then choose the box.
Should I wash clothes before putting them in the box?
Choose what you want to retain, then check the fabric and condition before cleaning. Store any unwashed garment separately from paper and inspect it periodically.
Can a child have a memory box of their own?
Yes. Let them pick a few things themselves. Keep fragile or valuable items in the main box and put a photograph of each in theirs.